Blog

  • After decades on benzos, I finally have the solution to anxiety. It is not what you want to hear.

    There is no magic pill, magic supplement, magic therapy, exercise, anything that will kill your anxiety once and for all. Sorry. I learned after decades on benzos that benzos kill anxiety quite well (but not the anxiety about thinking about taking them for anxiety) but in the end, your baseline anxiety level is higher and…


  • Valium withdrawal at the 2 month mark

    I am happy to say that at this point the valium withdrawal and disequilibrium nonsense is pretty much over with! I couldn’t be happier. A lot has changed though. My anxiety baseline is now lower than what it was on valium, for some strange reason. I thought I would be an anxious mess, having panic…


  • Residual Disequilibrium – I feel like I’m on a boat and everything is happening a second ahead of me

    Residual disequilibrium is rarely mentioned outside of medical literature, yet it can be a deeply distressing during benzodiazepine withdrawal or after discontinuation. Here is what I learned about this strange phenomena after abruptly stopping diazepam and entering a new, strange reality. This is an article and a short story about a strange medical condition called…


  • Stopping benzos – my journey so far

    Stopping benzos – my journey so far

    Wednesday, September 17, 2025 was the last time I took Valium. I’ve been prescribed it since I was 17, making it a 23 year run of benzo dependence. I was down to 2.5-5mg every couple days. Still, it was a stupid thing I did (stop basically cold turkey) and my reasoning was more if I…


  • The Curse of Insight In Psychosis: A Patient’s Perspective

    What is insight in psychiatry? Insight in psychiatry is defined as Insight into your illness is considered a good thing and a positive towards successful treatment, but there can be a devastating paradox that comes with recognizing that you’re sick and need help. The Paradox of Insight The paradox of insight in schizophrenia means that…


  • Current Meds, Currently Kinda Stable

    Current Meds, Currently Kinda Stable

    This is a first post and sort of “where I am right now” compared to where I’ve been for the past little while and what meds I’m on, what’s working, what isn’t, and potential changes coming up. The Main Meds Abilify Maintena – Long Acting Abilify Injection Abilify Maintena is a monthly (28 days) long…